Barma wraps him up tight in his arms, hanging on. Whisking the world away.
The woods, as he'd described them. Lovely, tall, autumnal, with the dawn light filtering through the leaves, the crackle of ferns around their feet, the rough beat of a bird's wings in the air.
Al doesn't bother looking up. He just grips Barma's shirt and tries to fight back all the fear, all the old pain he thought he'd numbed out and learned to simply accept.
It was one thing to have someone disappear. It was quite another to believe, even for a moment, that someone he loved would deliberately abandon him.
Gradually, he stops shaking, but he doesn't open his eyes.
"I had a taste of it. An inkling. Surviving was more important right then.
If I had been left alone with it and nothing else, you would have seen something very different."
He half-smiles, sadly.
"My whole life has been made from facing terrible things. I've learned to stay alive before everything else. That wasn't the first time, and it won't be the last."
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Date: 2012-03-14 07:13 am (UTC)Very gentle.
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Date: 2012-03-14 07:20 am (UTC)He whispers, and his voice breaks.
It wasn't the fire. It wasn't the danger. It was the thought of Barma leaving him behind. Of being forgotten.
Again.
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Date: 2012-03-14 07:20 am (UTC)Crossing to him, fast.
"You will never, ever, ever be left."
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Date: 2012-03-14 07:23 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-03-14 07:25 am (UTC)The woods, as he'd described them. Lovely, tall, autumnal, with the dawn light filtering through the leaves, the crackle of ferns around their feet, the rough beat of a bird's wings in the air.
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Date: 2012-03-14 07:39 am (UTC)It was one thing to have someone disappear. It was quite another to believe, even for a moment, that someone he loved would deliberately abandon him.
Gradually, he stops shaking, but he doesn't open his eyes.
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Date: 2012-03-14 07:41 am (UTC)Licking his bottom lip.
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Date: 2012-03-14 07:43 am (UTC)"I'm still mad," he whispers, but doesn't protest the touching.
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Date: 2012-03-14 07:45 am (UTC)Smiling down at him.
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Date: 2012-03-14 07:46 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-03-14 07:49 am (UTC)Thumbing the tear away.
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Date: 2012-03-14 07:51 am (UTC)"Kiss me? Touch me? I need-"
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Date: 2012-03-14 07:52 am (UTC)"Intense fear play; off the list."
Pulling him up against his body.
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Date: 2012-03-14 07:54 am (UTC)"No, just- just that. Abandonment."
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Date: 2012-03-14 07:56 am (UTC)Kissing the top of his head.
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Date: 2012-03-14 07:58 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-03-14 07:58 am (UTC)Kissing his forehead.
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Date: 2012-03-14 07:59 am (UTC)Mildly astonished. Surely Barma's just used to saying that by now.
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Date: 2012-03-14 08:02 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-03-14 08:04 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-03-14 08:05 am (UTC)Scoffing.
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Date: 2012-03-14 08:09 am (UTC)If I had been left alone with it and nothing else, you would have seen something very different."
He half-smiles, sadly.
"My whole life has been made from facing terrible things. I've learned to stay alive before everything else. That wasn't the first time, and it won't be the last."
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Date: 2012-03-14 08:11 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-03-14 08:14 am (UTC)Gently.
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Date: 2012-03-14 08:15 am (UTC)He admits, softly.
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